The Tampon
by Kolinshar Benito
Summary: [ONE SHOT] When Hikaru and Kaoru go rifling through Haruhi’s bag, they discover a box of certain 'somethings' that makes them want to close the door that they began to crack open to the world. And deadbolt it shut. Rated T for Tampon.


**The Tampon** by Kolinshar Benito

When Hikaru and Kaoru go rifling through Haruhi's bag, they discover a box of certain _somethings_ that makes them want to close the door that they began to crack open to the world. And deadbolt it shut.

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**NOTES: **

**Beware. **Lots and _lots _of run on sentences. But this is how the story compelled itself to be written, so enjoy and **read slowly**. I'd suggest saying some of the longer ones out loud, because it might make more sense, in a strange and twisted sort of way. The juxtapositions in the paragraphs are supposed to contradict the previous statements, so go with the flow and I hope you enjoy.

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There once was a castle which housed twin moons in its highest tower. These twin princes were identical in appearance and action, but in mind, yearned for separate things. However, isolated here since the time of their birth, they had learned over the ages that all they needed was each other and with that single thought, they were content.

And content they were until they met _her_, a maid who had played them, the twins who were moons. Then she complained how she couldn't tell who was which, and which was who, as they were always both half hidden in the dark. So they started a new past time, where one was Hikaru and the other Kaoru, both wrong and right, able to switch left and right with a skillful peek of the eyes. And because of this maid, who later escaped into the darkness she disliked, they learned there was _more_ to see past their window in this tower and slowly creeped out of the room that had initially been their _entire_ world.

And so came the time where the two twin moons left their high place in the sky and they walked down the corridor to look out of the castle's windows. Then they learned that their world was not just a tower, but a kingdom.

* * *

"**Huh? What is this?"**

* * *

Their world was expanding. Not by much, but enough to make considerable increase in area over a certain span of time. If the twins were the core, and their world was a circle, its radius began to sweep into the abyss, stretching centimeters wider as the days went by.

And like all things hidden, there was a door this realm was cleverly concealed behind. Many had knocked, calling gently for an invitation to be allowed inside. However, the moons' world was their own, a private castle, thrown under a veil of mystery. So when others knocked, the twins would ignore it. Their castle was their own, and the guests they allowed in were placed under careful scrutiny.

Some rapped their knuckles loudly on the entrance way to their domain, in an attempt to win the attention of the moons with their screaming and shouting and incessant whining that only fell on deaf ears. That is, until the sun lord managed to muscle his way in, and the twins were stumped on how to rid themselves of this self imposed house guest.

And because of this self proclaimed king and his attempts to get into the kingdom that nobody had seen, the sun lord's army cracked at the plaster wall that was the moons' defense to get inside. There now was a weakness to their safety, and since the damage was done on the _outside_ of the wall, and they remained solely on the _inside_, they could do nothing but pray that no one else would notice the chipping and peeling white plaster.

* * *

"**Kaoru, look what I found!"**

* * *

And when this sun king invited _others_ to _their_ kingdom, the moons built a moat to stop the strangers' arrival. But this sun child wanted the moons to see _more,_ so he fashioned a boat out of dry reeds and mud which carried these new princes to the twin moons' isolated shores.

The mirror reflections sniped and they argued with the king of the sun, but eventually they relented because their arguments became _boring_ and their pranks became _predictable. _Since boring and predictable were not adjectives they particularly enjoyed, the twins settled down on their matching thrones and called for the new guests to bring their offerings.

* * *

"**What is it, Hikaru?"**

* * *

The first to enter was a man smaller than they, with bright, wide eyes and a playful grin. This innocent smile was not common to their world, a world where the twins had only seen the sly and the underhanded smirks of the greedy. And for the sake of a playmate, and the desire to smile _just like that_, the twin princes accepted the white cake that was presented, and tasted strawberries for the first time.

So they ordered a strawberry patch planted, whose roots began to seep into unexplored corners of the earth and the plaster defense that surround the moon kingdom struggled to contain the palace within. But because the moons had ordered strawberries, the strawberries' orders became law. So the border obeyed the strawberries' demands, and expanded its border to accommodate their growth.

And because the border was thinning as it got larger, the chipping plaster caused by the sun lord's army on the outside of the wall began to groan in distress.

* * *

"**Is it a marshmallow?"**

* * *

And small fissures began to streak across their plaster wall, but the twins were having fun and didn't see that their defenses were beginning to crumble.

Then the border fell down, so only the door that people used knock at was left standing alone to protect an entire kingdom. Behind the tiny frame, the small door failed to mask the presence of the kingdom of the moons by itself, and the commotion the hidden kingdom that was no longer hidden was causing outside attracted the prankster moons who then noticed their plaster wall was _missing._ They cried in panic, and in their distress, made a sloppy border made only of mud and poorly baked bricks. There were holes in the wall, and normal townsfolk began peeking through the perforated border that once held a kingdom.

* * *

"**Maybe it's commoner cotton candy?"**

* * *

To distract them from their stress, the sun king asked them to play a game with the guest princes, and because the moons were lazy and did not want to build another border, they relented once again to the sun lord's request and welcomed with the princesses that began to flock to their castle with the border of holes.

And when the princesses' gave their offerings and the moons' coffers were simply bursting from the amount of gold, the moons found pleasure in tickling the fancies of dreamy eyes. But when they acted, they played for only themselves and they found themselves repeating the game their former maid had inspired. And so Hikaru became Kaoru, and up became down, and with more tabooed touches, they easily switched their roles from day to day. They changed to become opposites and the same so it wouldn't become _boring, _so they wouldn't become _predictable,_ and because the princesses' never thought this, the moons continued to play.

* * *

"**Wow, it absorbed **_**all**_** the tea from the tea cup!"**

* * *

And then there was a _knock_, a sound they hadn't heard in a millennia, and therefore the twin moons had forgotten the sound of its hum. The door was being touched, caressed, and whispered to, but they had been used to the princesses crawling through the gaps in the walls, so Hikaru and Kaoru ignored the call to sit in their thrones to see if they had a new guest.

So when the moons went to retire in their single bed in the highest tower of their castle, one twin peeked outside of their window and saw a small figure resting his head against their door. So this twin who was slightly more different from his identical counterpart realized what the sound they had heard earlier really was, and intrigued that someone was knocking for the first time in _long_ time, he descended down the steps of the tower without his brother and personally opened the door to his kingdom.

* * *

"**Hey, you know, it sort of looks like a tea bag right now."**

* * *

It was a peasant boy, and not a princess, at the foot of the door. Disappointed that there was no new royalty for him to play with, he began to close the door before the head that was sleeping upon their doorstep roused awake. Kaoru the Moon then realized he was staring at two twin stars embedded deeply in this peasant boy's eyes, and that peasant boy wasn't a boy but truly a girl. She was a peasant girl with two stars in her eyes and she wanted his help to remove them.

He had never encountered a mystery before, let alone a mystery _alone_ without his twin moon. But this brother who was a little different wished to do something _alone_ for the first time. So he told the peasant girl to follow him and they entered his throne room so she could present her offering to the prince of the hidden kingdom.

And because Kaoru did this, the border of his kingdom began to crack once more as the strawberry patches that had grown amok in their gardens seemed to grow larger and therefore stretched their roots further, once again, thinning the already perforated wall

* * *

"**Blegh. That tastes **_**terrible.**_**" **

* * *

And since his brother was in the tower, and _he_ was in throne room, the sleeping moon called Hikaru cast a pale moonlight on his brother below. Therefore, the moons that were always dark became different. One was left in the tower, hidden in the darkness and the other basked in the radiance his brother shone and became lighter in shade during this night.

The peasant girl offered to give them the _preciously rare_ stars in her eyes if he could take them out, and as he was one of the two who truly _yearned_ for rare things, he accepted the offering and gently kissed her.

* * *

"**Hikaru! Kaoru! **_**What **_**are you **_**doing?!**_**"**

* * *

His lips left her own after a few _hours_, and the peasant boy who was really a girl with stars in her eyes turned into a _princess_ with two lights in her palms and fell to the ground in a silent heap. It was Kaoru realized that despite he was identical to another he was suddenly _different _because he had kissed a peasant who had turned into a princess, and his brother had not.

* * *

"**This is **_**mine**_**. You guys can't just go a person's things like that."**

* * *

And when the peasant princess arose from her slumber on the cold, palace tile, she felt two sets of eyes just _looking_ at the girl who had made their strawberry garden grow underneath the wall that could no longer contain them.

* * *

"**Tell us what this is!"**

* * *

They told her that what was one's must also be the other's, and even though Kaoru the Moon did not want to share with his brother, he did anyway because they were the moon twins and they had been content with just that before Kaoru kissed her to be different.

She then told them that since one moon had taken the stars out of her eyes, and that because she was no longer blind and could finally see, she would grant the request to the two moon princes.

* * *

"**Is it a commoner type of tea? Because the flavor is simply just **_**terrible**_**."**

* * *

The peasant princess gave each moon one of her stars, and because the twins had never seen stars or a peasant princess, they made her stay in their kingdom because she was _rare_ and a treasure and they were selfish like that but the peasant princess did not really mind. They made her stay with them in their tower when they found out that the peasant princess didn't care that they were each other when they weren't but could tell when up was truly down, left was truly right, and who Hikaru and Kaoru truly were.

* * *

"**What? A t**_**ea bag**_**? What are you talking about? Have you never seen a **_**tampon**_** before?"**

* * *

And when each moon kissed the peasant princess with a star in opposite hands, the border and the door that shielded the kingdom that was previously hidden, faded away and revealed the earth.

**End.**

--

This story is written like this because it's basically one massive thought spewed out. I hoped you were at least thoroughly confused for a number of the sections and you cringed at the part where you found out that the twins thought a tampon was a freaking "commoner" tea bag.

_Kolinshar._


End file.
